These days puppies are getting a bad ‘rap’ on the Internet and if you ask me that’s a load of hooey! It turns out that kittens with birth defects are soaring in popularity while genetic rejects of the canine variety languish in relative anonymity. This malarky is getting my dander up and I mean to put a stop to it and no mistake! And so I present to you a list of the top 5 meme-ready puppies! It’s ‘flea’ of charge and these little guys are just ‘itching’ to become memes. All these precious babies have defective DNA, so their meme-worthyness is built right in! If your face doesn’t literally peel back from your skull from all the cuteness you are not a human and should get back in your dumb flying saucer and get out of my country of America!
Moony is cuddy widdle pup! Hims mommy had to have the cutest c-section ever to get him out of her tumtum. Now he’s the most scratchety lumpy boy in the world!
Moony’s adorable head makes him walk sideways and sometimes he can’t even lift it to eat. But that won’t stop you from wanting to just eat him up!
- Complaining about lumpy mashed potatoes
- Complaining about heavy things
- Inability to find hats
Nakee puppy is so naked and fun! Besides being all pink and hairless, Nakee has to be fed through a stomach port for the rest of her life because her teeth are overgrown and her esophagus is improperly formed. The needle is buried on my cutometer! Nakee had the cutest skin cancer on her ears when she was born and even though they were removed her people mommy saved them. Now when she ever gets depressed, she can look at them and her heart and depression just melt away like our polar ice caps. Global warming? More like Global CUTING!
- Sexual desire
- Nudist activities
- Bath time
Some puppies have a mommy and daddy and get to have a snuggle-wuggle life with all their buddies and sissies and some puppies grow in a lab after being genetically modified by a team of science-certified Cute Techs! Solving the age-old problem of fish being emotionally unavailable, Aquato is the new scion of the pettable fish movement! His big ole mouth and swishy tail will turn your mopes into rainbows and you’ll only want to put him down when his skin starts to dehydrate and he must return to the water to breathe.
- Water sports
- Fish for dindin
- Big smiles
2. Muddy Buddy
Muddy Buddy is the perfect companion for someone on the go who doesn’t have a lot of time to take care of a sweet little boy but still wants their daily infusion of adorable. ‘MudBud’ loves to sleep all day, make no sound whatsoever and never ever eat! The Cute store called, they’re closing because they can’t compete with this puppy!
- Mud puddles
- Love to death
Let’s face it pups, the kittens are eating our lunch out there. Even though I’ve overloaded FeedBuzz’s cuteness processors with all of you adoracute puppies in this post we’ve got an uphill battle the size of Mt. Everest. I gotta be honest, I think the only puppy here who has a chance at this point in history is Garfield. We have to think like a team.
I hired a bunch of huggable nerds from Japan to help me create a puppy whose cute factor would break the current scale and render all meme kittens obsolete. It took 10 years and several kickstarter campaigns but we’ve done it! And just look at this darling baby! He has all the elements of a beautiful puppy: pokety whiskers, a heart-destroying meow and a litter box full of puppy poopoos. You can only observe Garfield over the internet because you will die and enter the afterlife of your choosing if you see him in person. The cute is overwhelming to the point of being deadly!
We theorize that Garfield has the potential to make all animal memes obsolete. When we unleash our puppy Garfield unto an unsuspecting internet, language and life will lose all meaning. The Earth will be destroyed in the Vortex of Precious and humans will blink out of existence, never having traveled to even our nearest celestial neighbor.
What have we wrought? The Adoraclypse! And we are unashamed.
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