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The Only Three Good Sex-Based Tumblr Confessions Blogs

With Yahoo!’s recently announced purchase of the hyper popular blogging platform Tumblr for 1.1 billion United States dollars, many tech pundits (like Gawker’s Sam Biddle) are wondering rightly how the sterilized Yahoo! brand will attempt to monetize all this pornography, gore, and teenage selfies. Some of these teen pornographers are similarly rightly concerned that they will lose their blogs entirely. With that in mind, let’s take some time to celebrate the only three good sex-based Tumblr confession blogs.

3. WWE Wrestling Sex Confessions

a dildo

If there’s one thing the WWE isn’t, it’s subtle. Every single night, all across our Jericoholic, Hulkamanic Cenation, buff hunks and hot babes are sweatin’ with each other in massive arenas absolutely packed from ringside all the way to the tarp-covered other three quarters of the bleachers. It’s always vaudevillian and it’s often extremely sexual. That’s where the WWE Wrestling Sex Confessions blog comes in. Every single night, someone, somewhere, is choosing a seemingly arbitrary musclebound sports entertainer and writing elaborate erotic fiction about them with a cute little 😉 at the end – to let us know what they mean by it – and then submitting it to Kristina Gonzalez, P.O. Box 99, Rock Tavern, NY 12575, for public cum-sumption.

2. Dirty Politics Confessions

FDR

I don’t care if you’re a Democrat or a Republican, an Israeli or a Palestinian: a hot bod is a hot bod. Dirty Politics Confessions is a place for us to reach-around across the aisle and admit that we’d just love to bottom for some of those rich White men who are topping our sweet land of liberty into the ground every day anyway. If you’re like me and are Kevin Costner in the 2008 comedy-drama film Swing Vote, not to worry! You need only a minor recollection of the fact that FDR suffered from polio to know that these steamy secrets fail the Miller test!

1. Dirty Disney Confessions

ape man

Walter Elias “Walt” Disney (December 5, 1901 – December 15, 1966) was an American animator, film producer, director, screenwriter, voice actor, entrepreneur, entertainer, international icon,and philanthropist, whose myriad creations we all want to hump. Aladdin’s nippleless torso, Captain Hook’s hook, and Johnny Depp are just a few of the Disney properties eligible for fetishization in this family hostile collection available for the first time in stunning 1024×768 resolution. Surprisingly, there are no confessions based on the penis in The Little Mermaid, but if you hurry you can catch the Dirty Disney Confessions sanctioned HOTTEST DISNEY MALE!!!!!!! and HOTTEST DISNEY FEMALE!!!!!! competitions, which, (I’m assuming), are neverending.

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